Meeting Your Swimmer Where They Are: Why It Matters

As parents and coaches, it’s easy to focus on where we want our swimmers to be: achieving certain time cuts, winning races, or reaching the next group level. But one of the most powerful things we can do for our athletes is to meet them where they are right now.

💡 What does it mean to “meet your swimmer where they are”?

✅ Understanding their current abilities, mindset, and goals
Instead of comparing them to teammates or siblings, focus on their individual progress and needs.

✅ Supporting their stage of development
Each swimmer learns at their own pace. Some master technique quickly but take longer to build confidence, while others excel in competition but need time to refine strokes.

✅ Listening to their feelings and challenges
Some days your swimmer may feel motivated and strong; other days, they may feel discouraged. Meeting them where they are means honoring those emotions and guiding them forward with empathy.

🔑 Why is this so important?

💛 Builds confidence and trust
When swimmers feel understood and supported without judgment, they build self-confidence and a stronger relationship with you as their parent or coach.

💛 Encourages long-term love of the sport
Focusing only on results can burn swimmers out. Celebrating effort, progress, and small victories keeps swimming enjoyable.

💛 Promotes healthy development
Not all swimmers progress on the same timeline. Pushing them beyond readiness can lead to injury, fear, or frustration.

💛 Teaches life skills
When swimmers feel supported for who they are right now, they learn resilience, patience, and self-acceptance – skills they’ll use far beyond the pool.

🏊‍♂️ How can you meet your swimmer where they are?

1. Ask open-ended questions:
   “How did that set feel today?” instead of “Why weren’t you faster?”

2. Celebrate small wins:
   New technique skills, consistent attendance, and mental toughness are all victories.

3. Avoid comparisons:
   Every swimmer is on their own journey. Focus on their improvements.

4. Partner with their coach:
   Understand what they’re working on right now and how you can support that at home.

5. Adjust expectations when needed:
   If your swimmer is in a growth spurt, mentally overwhelmed, or returning from illness, remember progress isn’t always linear.

💭 Final thoughts

Meeting your swimmer where they are doesn’t mean lowering standards or giving up on goals. It means supporting them fully on their journey to get there. By honoring their current abilities, mindset, and needs, you’re empowering them to grow into strong, confident athletes who love swimming for life.